Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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