You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
no, he came in my armpit
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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