Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
Randomize