you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize
