My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Randomize
