that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize