he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Also my face is like def lowkey made of silly putty
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
Randomize
