problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Randomize
