party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
