I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
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