i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
