She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
