on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
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