Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
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