my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
