like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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