he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
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