You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
I just had a dude tell me how he got fired from friendly's for tripping a kid and followed the story with "If i'm gonna do it, I do it big."
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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