I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Randomize
