Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
