I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Randomize
