You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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