Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
