what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize
