Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
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