theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize