at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize
