you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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