Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
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