erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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