Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I know you think you’re ready to graduate but just keep these things in mind: taxes, I get up at 5 AM every morning, I have to buy vegetables when I go grocery shopping, and I can’t wear sweat pants to work. Take that victory lap and enjoy the sweat pants and bar hopping because it goes downhill real quick.
Randomize
