how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
drinking out of a sandbucket again
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
