Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
This house was built for laser tag.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
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