i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
