he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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