Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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