Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
