I want to stick my p in your. b.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I duct taped a bottle of vodka to the back of your closet while you were sleeping in case of emergencies. Go rip it off, it's going to be a long night.
Randomize
