Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
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