I like my sex mixed with concussions.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
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