This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You can't motorboat a personality
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
