Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
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