I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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