he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
