speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
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