goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
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