it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
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