Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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