My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
