You're completely useless in the revolution.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
