I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
